OK... I realize that this is going to be blasphemous...but I think I am starting to understand what it means to be a mom... in the smallest way possible.
I am up at 4 every morning, playing and eating and cleaning up poop..
I am constantly saying "no Kuma..no biting dad's shoes." or "no Kuma... no eating the spiders under the couch."
I know that a baby is way way different, but I am getting a glimpse of what some of you do every day.
Yesterday we slept on the floor (he slept, I edited a paper for 6 hours)
I couldn't sleep last night because of all of this house stuff (again, I will tell it all when we have the final word passed down to us, but right now it just frustrates me and I will say something I shouldn't) So I opened my Bible.
I am not a big fan of just opening the book and letting whatever is there be mine...
Except for last night. Dave (sleeping away, arm over his face cause I had he overhead light on) was sleping through the turmoil of my mind and heart (although I know he has been feeling it too..)
Jeremiah wasnt talking about my situation when he wrote Lamentations. He was listening to God and his obedience spoke to me and calmed me enough to go to sleep.
"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, 'the Lord is my portion, therefore I will wait for him.'
The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.
It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young.
Let him sit alone in silense, for the Lord has laid it on him.
Let him bury his face in the dust- there may YET be hope.
Let him offer his cheek to one who would strike him,
and let him be filled with disgrace.
For men are not cast off by the Lord forever.
THough he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love.
For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men."
Lamentations 3: 22-36